Tuesday, 11 November 2014

November update

Well, it's been a little while since I updated here but unfortunately, I've been pretty unwell and haven't felt like dragging out the laptop and tapping away.  There's been some good news and some setbacks: a CT scan I had a few weeks' back showed that the chemo was doing its job and the tumour in my liver had shrunk.  Good news indeedy but this was overshadowed last month when I had to go to A & E as I was having trouble breathing and could hardly walk.  The breathlessness had been creeping up on me for several weeks but as I knew it was a side effect of the chemo, I must admit, I didn't stress out too much about it at the time.  Ok, so I was very very tired all the time and had no energy for anything other than the necessaries. Our trips up to the Marsden had become a trek for me and whereas I had been able to walk the 30 minutes from our hotel to RM, taxis were now the order of the day, both there and back.  I had trouble walking short distances, getting seriously out of breath and feeling like crap!

I had to stay in hospital for a week, as the doctors tried to work out what was wrong. A blood clot on my lung was one possibility, as was neutropenia (a killer for cancer patients if not caught in time) but a week of daily blood tests (well done PICC line for all your sterling work there!), lovely antibiotic IV's and a CT scan revealed no clot, thank god, but obvious damage to my lung, probably caused by the chemo.  Having missed a complete chemo cycle, we traipsed back up to London having been pre-warned that I probably wouldn't be having  chemo and that's exactly what has happened.  I'm having a break for a few weeks to allow my lung to heal, but the CT scan showed that the tumour was still shrinking and the mets in my lung had all but dissipated.  So it's a double edged sword.  The chemo drugs are  working but at the cost of my lung, so the plan when we go back to RM in December will be another CT scan and then decide what course of action to take with regards to the chemo drugs. 

Still on a reducing dose of steroids which have completely wrecked my sleeping patterns and they just pile on the pounds! I'm awake most of the night and am at a loss to understand how I stay awake during the day! Feel sorry for Kev who wakes up as soon as I move and then has to put up with me being awake in the small hours of the night, reading or playing a game on my iPad! Being off the chemo has given me my old life back, even if it's only for a short while.  I feel well, I'm eating well and enjoying having my tastebuds and I can even forget I have cancer, just now and then.   As the doctor from our hospice said to me, you get so used to feeling ill, you forget what it's like to feel normal.  How true that is.  Plus, my hair is growing back, albeit a different shade to what I had before, but hey, it's hair!!